pcos

Thankful Thursday - Unexpected Moments of Awe

Thankful Thursday - Unexpected Moments of Awe

Thankful Thursday – Unexpected Moments of Awe

Monday evening, sitting on the couch finally unwinding from a hellish few days with very sick twin 3 year-olds, feeling a bit lousy myself, a text popped up on my phone. Upon opening it, my breath completely left my body.  Aunt Diane, my father’s youngest sister (youngest of 9 total!) had found a photo of my father at age 6 or 7 that she thought I’d enjoy. I knew it was my father, of course but I was literally staring at my son Reed’s face just a few short years from now. I was overcome with emotion, tears filled my eyes. I was completely in awe. His sweet expression so comforting to me.

Thankful Thursday - Awakening

Thankful Thursday - Awakening

My entire life, I’ve often felt like I don’t quite fit in. That folks don’t really “get” me – that I was always lingering on the edges trying to be just like everyone else, to be accepted. Weird, emotional, too serious at times and too silly at other times were things I’ve often heard about myself – especially as a child. Fast forward to trying to start a family with my husband, Wes, living on a US Naval Air Base at the time (where everyone knows everyone’s business) and of course I was again the one on the outside edges, not quite fitting in. Not only was I extremely infertile, I’d also need a gestational surrogate to carry my children – something that most people were completely unfamiliar with. As I’ve gotten older my armor has gotten stronger, I appear fearless to some, but deep down I still have an innate yearning to “fit-in” and here I was – THE most different than everyone around me in my entire life.